January 24, 2007

ONW


That's short for "omit needless words", Will Strunk's famous injunction to writers.  Until today, I hadn't realized there was an ONW poem, but there is: the preface to Maurice Sagoff's book ShrinkLits is the following "condensed" version of The Elements of Style:


"Omit needless words!"
Said Strunk to White.
"You're right,"
Said White,
"That's nice
Advice.
But Strunk,
You're drunk
With words --
Two-thirds
Of those
You chose
For that
Fiat
Would fill
The bill!

Would not
The thought
-- The core --
Be more
Succinct
If shrinked
(Or shrunk)?"

Said Strunk:
"Good grief!
I'm brief
(I thought)
P'raps not ...
Dear me!
Let's see ...
Okay!
Just say
'Write tight!'
No fat
in that!"

"Quite right!"
Said White,
"Er -- I mean 'Quite!'
Or, simply, 'Right!' "

(Thanks to Rowyn McDonald for supplying me with the poem.)

A somewhat different, but also entertaining, take on ONW came from Geoff Pullum last July, when he wrote me:

I offer you a Goedelian paradox... Consider the advice, "Omit needless words".  Why not omit the word "needless" here?  You should, if the word "needless" is needless in this context.  Is it?  Well, if it is needless, you should omit it, and say simply, "Omit words".  But then you have not given the right advice about which words to omit.  So the word "needless" must be needed.  Why is it needed?  The sentence "Omit words" does make sense.  The problem is that it clearly gives bad advice unless it is understood in terms of omitting words that are NOT NEEDED.  But if it HAS TO be understood thus, then "needless" is predictable in this context, just from common sense.  Therefore "needless" should be omitted.  But then you have not given the right advice about which words to omit.  So the word "needless" must be needed...  Do you get a sense of where I'm going with this?

zwicky at-sign csli period stanford period edu

Posted by Arnold Zwicky at January 24, 2007 04:25 PM